Setting Boundaries as a Nice Guy
Nice Guys can't say no. They fear conflict, rejection, disapproval. They say yes when they mean no. They over-give. Dr. Glover identifies boundary-setting as a core Breaking Free activity. This guide covers scripts, practice, and overcoming guilt.
- Boundary-setting is a core Breaking Free activity
- Saying no isn't selfish, it's self-respect
- Scripts and practice build the muscle
Why Nice Guys Struggle with Boundaries
Fear of conflict, rejection, disapproval. Belief that saying no is selfish. Toxic shame (I don't deserve to have limits). The reality: saying no is self-respect. People who care about you will respect your boundaries.
Scripts for Saying No
'I'm not able to do that.' 'That doesn't work for me.' 'I need some time for myself.' No long explanation. No apology (unless warranted). No hedging. ConfidenceConnect provides boundary-setting practice with scripts.
Frequently Asked Questions
- How do Nice Guys learn to set boundaries?
- Practice saying no. Start small. Use scripts: 'I'm not able to do that.' 'That doesn't work for me.' Tolerate the guilt, it passes. Boundary-setting is a skill that improves with practice.
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From the Blog
- How to Set Boundaries as a Man: The Nice Guy's Guide to Saying No Without Guilt
Learn to set boundaries as a man. Dr. Glover's framework for saying no, scripts for common situations, and overcoming guilt. For recovering Nice Guys.